Injustice 2-D

May 22, 2017

So DC/Warner and Netherealm (Mortal Kombat) have released a sequel to the Injustice: Gods Among Us video game. Like the first game, the fighters have a chat with each other before the fight. During the fight, they'll taunt each other during a betting mechanic called the Clash.

I was thinking about the Darfur 3 superhumans and what they would say if they were forced to tussle with the likes of Superman, Atrocitus, Green Lantern, and Captain Cold. Killer Frost and Raven are not in this game, sorry.

Batman: Clyde Irons

Clyde: You've heard of me?

Batman: There's a cell in Arkham with your name on it.

Clyde: That cardboard prison couldn't hold a cripple.

Poison Ivy: Kiss me, lover.

Jamir: My American friends would accept your proposal, but not me.

Catwoman: Little optimistic, Soad.

Soad: I have 33 different powers and you have a whip

Catwoman: Let me give you a dose of reality.

Soad: That cat suit must be on too tight.

Blue Beetle: Thought you were a good guy, Mr. Irons.

Clyde: I'm a quote/unquote complex character.

Blue Beetle: I am hopelessly confused.

Power Girl: How many friggen Earths are there?

Clyde: About thirty thousand, including mine.

Power Girl: Let's send you back to yours!

Clyde: Wait; I need to validate my parking first.

Jamir: I came to this Earth to copy your weapons and abilities.

Darkseid: And why should that worry me?

Jamir: I found your weaknesses. And you have many...

Supergirl: You fight like a noob!

Soad: I outrank you!

The Joker: You really do expect this to be a cakewalk!

Soad: I have 34 different powers. What's yours? Facepaint?

The Joker: That's what the others thought too.

Superman: You don't belong here!

Jamir: Heard you let a clown nuke a city. Clearly, you are weak.

Superman: Is that so?

Master Clyde: Why are you chasing me? I've committed no crimes.

Batman: You made children into weapons!

Master Clyde: I'm not the only one here who has...

Batman: I can't excuse the deaths.

Chucky: But they were tasty!

Batman: That's not the point!

Harley Quinn: You're crampin my style!

Soad: You have style?

Harley Quinn: I can't work with this!

Jamir: You really think you can beat us?

Brainiac: I have every advantage.

Jamir: You did, until I showed up.

Brainiac: You are beauty at its most sensuous.

Soad: And you are the ugliest thing in 40 light years.

Brainiac: Your defeat will be painful.

Soad: You're weaker than I thought.

Supergirl: As if!

Power Girl: Is it hot in here, or just me?

Chucky: Are you asking me out or for a weather report?

Power Girl: I don't even know where to start.

Darkseid: You cannot deny Darkseid.

Clyde: Been doing it all day.

Master Clyde: Why are you chasing me? I've committed no crimes.

Batman: You have a torture chamber!

Master Clyde: I have a permit for that.

Master Clyde: Why are you chasing me? I've committed no crimes.

Batman: You have a torture chamber!

Master Clyde: Perfectly legal in Texas.

Wonder Woman: You'll hurt people if I let you go.

Chucky: Only the ones I don't like.

Wonder Woman: Not for long.

Chucky: Are you supposed to scare me?

Scarecrow: Fear is my weapon.

Chucky: Minez too.